Warranty expired

So when exactly did it happen, this "old" thing? Getting old didn't seem to happen until the parts started wearing out and naturally the warranty had expired. After a full hard day of work which I'll admit dose not happen very often, I usually feel the pain and chase it with a few ibuprofen. The worse part is I know the body goes first then the mind is next. Well I am not old yet! If Paris Hilton could be my grand daughter or when the only new things in my life are prescription then I'll be old.
Slowly but surely the signs of aging are appearing. I know people who don't have an email address and I can remember when spam was still a strange meat. Am I old because I still keep a church key just in case I can not find a screwdriver to open a can of pork-en-beans in an emergence or remember when all wine bottles came with a real cork? Am I old because I cam remember when there was only one flavor of coke, well maybe two flavors when I emptied a bag of peanuts into the bottle? Am I old because I can remember pay phones and remember where to find one if I need to make a road side call? Am I old because I can remember getting under my school desk in case the Russians launched a nuclear attack?
The calender does not lie, this week it says I am another year older. Let's get this straight right now! It said I was another year older not that I was old and I always go by what the calender says, that is if I can remember to mark it down on the calender. I do remember the words to Happy Birthday so I sang Happy Birthday to myself.

I never lived in Mr. Rogers neighborhood

There is a whole generation of kids who grew up in his neighborhood and now they all think they are special. Kids today believe they are entitled. They all drive new cars at 16, have cell phones and computers at 12 and the worst part is they feel they are entitled to them. The list to their entitlements goes on and on. The only thing my generation is entitled to is a life long of indebtedness, a week dollar, no future Social Security and a never ending war.
If I had known that the success of my golden years would have depended on a generation of so called "special ones" I would have been picketing Mr. Roger's neighborhood long ago. My message would have been "If you want to be special you'll have to prove it. No one owes you anything, now get to work".
Mr. Rogers spent years telling little Johnny and little Susie he liked them just the way they were, he should have been telling them there is a lot of room for improvement. I know! I know! If I had kids I would feel different. Well I don't have kids, never wanted kids and yes you can call me self centered. I've always thought of myself as a little different, neither in a good or bad kind of way just a different kind of apple. Not an apple who thinks he is entitled to be setting on Mr. Rogers desk, not a special apple, just an apple who's a little different from the rest.

A gathering storm

Karl Rove, President Bush's political adviser has resigned. The puppet master in the back room won't be pulling the strings anymore. We may never know exactly why Karl Rove chose to resign. The only thing we know is that he said he wanted to spend more time with his family and to write a book. That's insulting to our intelligence. One thing is for sure, Rove didn't put any truth serum in his coffee the morning he made the announcement. All we know is that he is gone and now President Bush will have to dance alone.
There are several reasons for his departure and none of them are related to the reasons he gave. Let's not forget his campaign to discredit Ambassador Wilson for revealing that the Bush administration had manipulated and misused intelligence in order to make a case for attacking Iraq in 2003. And what about the Libby scandal! Libby took the rap for exposing Ambassador Wilson's wife as a CIA agent. Libby got a three and a half year sentence for that but never served a day in prison because President Bush pardoned him in a deal that would protect Rove who was the source for discrediting the Wilsons. Rove is currently the subject of a subpoena re guarding his role in the dismissal of US attorneys so President Bush and the Republican Party could illegally advance their political interest at the behest of the court system.
Karl Rove is one of the best manipulators of the political process the world has ever seen but he acted as if he was above the law. That is wrong. His dream of a huge conservative majority that would continue forever is in tatters. His strategies as the Architect of Division has left the country more divided, the special interest more powerful and the American people shut out from their government.
There is a giant cloud over the White House and the storm is gathering. Rove's resignation will not diminish the storm's strength but if the clouds could talk they would say "Goodbye and good riddance".

Wading in deep Do Do

Training camp has closed and preseason has began for the Dallas Cowboys along with their new coach Wade Phillips. When he was chosen to lead the Boys, there was an outpouring of rage at his signing. Phillips was not the sexy choice nor was he charismatic in front of the press. People called him bumbling and said he was not capable of leading the Cowboys to a Supper Bowl. His Texas twang and good old boy attitude seem to cause a perception problem for a lot of people. Phillips was too folksy, plain spoken and far too relaxed for the media to crown him with a star.
Lots of people call him mediocre but his record is far from mediocre. Obviously he has not won a Super Bowl but who among Jerry's choices had? I did not see Tom Landry standing in the unemployment line when Jerry selected Wade Phillips to lead the Cowboys. If Jerry had ask for my help when he chose a coach I would have said "Phillips is the only Texan in the bunch. Not only is he a Texan but his father was a great NFL coach so Wade has grown up with a football mind set. Besides, everybody knows that apples don't fall very far from the tree.
It won't be easy but Wade Phillips has a golden opportunity to demonstrate that hiring him was a risk worth taking. He's a good coach I just hope he doesn't tur out to be a bum. Wade just needs to remember four things. Jerry Jones, Jerry Jones, Jerry Jones and Jerry Jones. If Coach Phillips forgets any one of the four, he'll be wading in deep Do Do by mid season.

Checkout Clerk Wanted

Pumping my own gas is one thing but scanning my own items at the grocery store is another. A few years ago when self checkout machines first arrived in stores I would not go near one of the machines. I was so afraid that people would line up behind me waiting on me to finish my attempt at Man vs Machine that I was too jumpy to even try the machine. One Sunday I was in WalMart before 7 AM buying a paper. There were very few people in the store so I thought it was the perfect time to enter the contest of Man vs Machine. I only had one item to scan so surely I could win this contest and even if the machine beat me I would not have people standing over my shoulder laughing at me. Right from the start the machine took control, telling me there were unexpected items in the bagging area. What was it talking about? I expected to buy a newspaper when I entered the store, hell I even expected to buy the paper while I was still ten miles away from the store. I figured out I had set the paper in the bagging area before scanning it so I scanned the paper while holding it in my hand. Before I could put any money into the machine to pay for the paper the machine told me no items had been scanned. At that point my stress level sored and I began calling the machine some unpleasant names. A store clerk heard me and came to the defence of the machine telling me to take my paper to the customer service desk and pay for it there. The machine had won. After that battle every time I walked passed a self scanning machine I gave it a go to hell look.
Two years passed and a few weeks ago I was in a Home Depot buying a single item, it was my chance at round two Man vs Machine. Everything worked perfectly, the machine scanned the item and let me pay for it. I was out the door in no time flat. The aganee of defeat had been erased from my mind, I had beaten the machine. I wanted everyone to know of my victory so I grabbed my camera to take a picture of my defeated oponnite. As I began taking pictures of the machine I heard a voice say "Sir you can't do that". A store clerk had seen me taking pictures and once again rose to the defence of the machine. Somehow the machine new I had called it cousin some unflattering names a few years back and was now going to embarrass me in front of everybody in the store. The aganee of defeat came rushing back in. I should have been happy with the score tied 1 to 1 but no, I had to get my camera and play round 3. Now the score was Machine 2 Man 1. The machine had not only won, it had rubbed my face in the dirt. Oh well, a little dirt never hurt anyone. I'll live to play the machine again some day but I will never call it names again, it has too good of a memory.