Defending Myself

     About a third of Americans encounter a drinking problem in their lives but only 10% achieve the more serious status of alcohol dependence.  I fall into that 10% group.  A large percent of those affected by a substance problem fully recover simply by growing out of it but I was not one of them.  Treatment was a must for myself.  More AA meetings than any non addictive person can imagine was my only hope.
     I used to wonder why I did not recognize the problem earlier.  If I had my life would have been a lot less complicated.  Truth be known I probably did recognize the problem but like most addictive people I did not want to admit I was not in control.  Drinking to relieve stress, drinking alone and looking forward to that first drink every day should have been a tell tell sign long before abuse became a problem but I had excuses for each one of those.
     Defending myself stopped working about the same time alcohol stopped working and then it turned into a nightmare.  That forced me to realize my problem had not just surfaced rather it had occurred over a very long period in the form of a snowball that had gradually picked up speed as it rolled through life.  If I had not found AA I would probably be dead or in jail. A couple of weeks ago I celebrated thirteen years of continuous sobriety. Life is much better today but I never forget what I am or where I've been because another snowball could form ant time.